Ever wonder why all of the auto insurance companies in your area offer the same coverage at the same price? It’s because they’re stealing (Woah, I’m a lawyer now I guess) content off of each other’s sites. Well, actually just being really lazy and not thinking about what they can do to differentiate themselves. But, if you’re looking for an auto insurance company with a full-time SEO team (we have about 45 SEO consultants that work for us), we can help.

Have you ever switched to a new auto insurance provider, only to be disappointed? They raise your rates mid-policy or fail to honor discounts. Worst of all, though, your premiums just keep climbing!

Section: The Law Office version of the 80’s classic “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”

Just when you thought the laws of physics couldn’t get any more limiting, along comes a new law. This law (or set of laws; it’s not clear yet) applies to certain people who have difficulty with balance and posture — i.e. people who are doing their jobs too well in most situations, especially when they’re doing their jobs well online.

If your emails aren’t getting opened, you may be stuck in a never-ending loop of “please read this” messages that do nothing but cause you needless stress. Here’s how to free yourself from this annoyance and double down on the people who no longer want to receive your newsletter.

Section: You’re just a click or call away!

I’ve already given the facts, so don’t pretend you aren’t interested. You were just reading this out of courtesy, but now you are ready to take action. That’s why we’re here to help you improve your conversion rate. All you have to do is call 976-555-1111 (it’s in the US only). Maybe that number looks familiar, it’s your phone and it wasn’t listed on the page by accident. When you talk to us, we’ll walk you through how we can optimize your conversion rate by using our proprietary methodologies. We just want to make sure we are connecting you with the right expert. Why don’t you give us a call and see what we can do for your business?

Are you ready to start dominating the SERPs?I’m joking, of course, no one really dominates the SERPs. That would just be silly we’re all after the same thing, right? http://legalfacts.org/lawyer/ Anyways, it all starts with a conversation and if you’re tired of wasting time with your current SEO company, then give me a call or shoot me an email. I’d love to chat!

Section: But wait! There’s more!

The best marketing technique is to improve your product or service. However, there are a variety of techniques worth trying as well. One of those techniques is telling people about your wares. This is a list of phrases to start you off in the world of telling people about your product or service.

But wait! There’s more! In addition to being featured on Gizmodo, I also made Wired Magazine and have a total of 15+ million views. I can’t with how cool that is.

Section: We’re so confident you’ll love what we have to offer that we’ll throw in this 100% FREE case evaluation.

No, we’re not pulling the wool over your eyes. We’re seriously going to give you the chance to test-drive our guides for FREE. There’s absolutely no risk involved; only valuable knowledge to gain. Go ahead and claim your guide — I’ll even prove it to you with an offer of a 100% money back guarantee if it’s not as good as I say.

Section: One-on-one access to lawyers who care about your well-being.

A lot of people are scared to speak to a lawyer, but there is no reason for it. A legal issue doesn’t have to be overwhelming — you deserve someone on your side who cares about you and tries to help you in any way possible. That’s why we offer our clients one-on-one access to lawyers who care about their well-being.

As a layman, when you get sued it’s easy to need legal help and not know where to turn. That’s where I come in. I’m one of the leading attorneys in the nation in my area of expertise (dancing). So if you’re looking to settle your Bollywood or salsa lawsuit, don’t struggle with legal jargon and legalese. Hire me and I’ll give you one-on-one access so we can go over as many details of your case as you want.

Have you spent countless hours reading up on your case, but have yet to find an answer?

Ok, you’ve done the research. You’ve read all the books, you’ve read up on all the articles. You’ve asked your questions and considered all the angles. Now it’s time to find an answer. Maybe you just want a referral letter,legalfacts.org or maybe you want help placing your client on a low-risk track. Whatever the case may be, rest assured that we are different than other immigration law offices out there.

Every case is different. There are no two identical cases. Even if two people have the same type of case with similar facts, the outcome could be different for one reason or another. It could come down to which judge you drew or whether the defendant settles before trial. This reality is unsettling but true: Cases are anything but predictable.

Whatever you’ve heard about positive thinking and the advantages of practicing it — it’s true! I am by nature a very cynical jerk 🙁 The bad part is that my negativity leads to nothing but anger. And when I am angry, I find it hard to be happy. However, recently I have seen a noticeable change in my life after reading a lot of articles about the benefits of practicing gratitude and appreciation for what you already have — the “don’t worry, be happy” way of life. Here are 10 ways to do so.

Don’t worry, be happy.

Positive thinking has been shown to improve all areas of your health and well-being — physical, mental, emotional, and even spiritual. So much so that researchers have identified 52 different diseases or health conditions that can be prevented or even cured by applying a positive outlook to our everyday situations. See full list.

I remember my kindergarten teacher telling us a story about a penguin swimming in the freezing water and convincing himself that it was warm. Since then, I’ve always wondered if “the penguin” ever took his advice.