Becoming a parent is not only one of life’s biggest blessings but also an unfolding challenge. Apart from raising the child and paving possibilities for them, becoming a parent often puts pressure on relationships. Life becomes different after childbirth, regardless of how your relationship used to be.

Childbirth can take a toll on mothers. As you are probably aware, it can be highly inconvenient, especially when your partner desperately needs assistance after birth. Half the problem is that you’re exhausted and have far less time to spend with your companion.

While it is difficult to understand what your partner wants after childbirth, being capable of supporting them can make a huge difference. Your attempts to “show up” will make them feel less alone in their battle, regardless of what they’re going through.

Here’s what you can do to support your partner after childbirth:

1. Take the time to listen to your partner.

Communication will remain a two-way street, so take the time to listen to your partner and hear their feelings or thoughts. We frequently believe we are listening when, in fact, we are planning what we will say when our companion stops talking. It can be difficult sometimes, but try to commit to genuinely listening to what your partner is saying; don’t interfere, and don’t get aggressive. Instead, just hear what they have to say. Talking it out can help you understand why your significant other has been this way.

If the cause is something big, you should do something about it. For instance, medical malpractice is one of the leading causes of childbirth grievance. If God forbid, something like this has happened with you and your spouse; we suggest you get immediate help. The Birth Injury Justice Center is an excellent institute that will educate you about the entire process. You can begin the legal process and seek compensation with the information you’ll learn.

2. Go easy on your partner. 

It is not the “baby brain “; your partner is actually keeping track of a bunch of different details. For example, how many hours has it been since the baby was fed?

• Did the baby get enough sleep? 
• Was that last catnap enough for me? 
• When do I have to revisit the pediatrician? 
• Do I need to buy that stroller?

These questions were just a little glimpse. There is more to it. While your partner may not be verbalizing all these seemingly insignificant—but vital—thoughts and queries, they are attempting to keep track of them all. It’s also tiring. So you need to go easy on them and share some responsibilities.

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3. Don’t leave everything to them.

One of the most common misconceptions about becoming a parent is that your spouse will know exactly what to do. They don’t. They, like you, are learning on the job. The best way to support them is to get involved with your baby as much as possible. As a father, you may be concerned that you won’t know what to do and may be hesitant to intervene.

Be assured that your significant other feels the same way, even if they appear to be a pro. So spend as much time as possible with your baby. If you have older kids, assist in their care so your spouse can focus on your newborn. Roll up your sleeves and get ready to learn everything your spouse does.

4. When you’re at work, check in with your little family frequently. 

Even when things are going well, being alone with a baby all day can be exhausting. Your partner could be craving adult conversation or someone who cares as much as she does about how the baby’s poop looked this morning (do you think that’s bizarre?). Send them a text or call, and when you get home, let them tell you about their day. If your partner is too tired or cranky to talk, take the baby (no questions asked) and let your partner have some alone time.

5. Remember, there were once two. 

Being a new parent is an incredible experience, but it is fraught with challenges and changes – we’ve established that. Having a baby changes the dynamic of a relationship so drastically that it can be challenging to remember what it was like to be a twosome. Your partner may be different, but they’ll still want to know you love them. A simple hug and a pleasant conversation free of phones and TVs are simple ways to stay connected. Date nights may appear to be a thing of the past. Still, we believe that even if you don’t have time (or vitality) to get dressed up and go out to dinner, you should still make an effort to spend quality time with each other.

6. Get used to a lack of sleep

Take turns visiting the crib in the middle of the night. (This will be a way shorter trip if your baby’s sleeping in a bassinet in your room.) Even if she’s breastfeeding and doesn’t “need” you for 3 a.m. feedings, be there anyway for the diaper change. Besides, those middle-of-the-night cuddles are prime bonding time for all of you. Don’t miss them.

And even if you’re tired during the day, let her nap while you take over baby duty. Sure, you both need to catch up on your z’s, but remember that she’s also recovering physically from childbirth (and if she’s nursing, expending plenty of energy making milk).

7. Keep an eye on her mood

Baby blues affect up to 80 percent of new moms, and these disconcerting feelings often fade away after two weeks. But if the new mom still seems truly overwhelmed several weeks after the baby comes home, or experiences bouts of crying, irritability or sleep disruptions (other than those caused by the baby), prompt her to talk to her practitioner about it. Postpartum depression is a serious medical condition that requires treatment.

Conclusion

By practicing these steps, you can ensure a smooth healing process for your partner after childbirth. When it comes down to it, being kind, anticipating their needs, and listening go a long way – and when in doubt, food always works. Just keep in mind that communication is key to supporting your partner. And there is no such thing as “perfect,” what matters is that you do your best and hope for a better and happier life.